I started in worship. Thinking of an assignment given to me by my counselor. “Self-work” is difficult when you’re searching your soul and heart. This is what I painted in worship while thinking about how I view myself and how God actually views me.
I see myself lowly, with low self-confidence, as if I’m not enough sometimes, as in the shadows viewing myself from the past, but God sees me “Big.” A man of God. His child. Loved and valued by Him. I have to see myself in His light as a man with confidence in front of others, in public, in critiques, -basically I have to apply how God sees me in all aspects of my life. I can no longer walk in the shadows of my past or in the way I view myself.
Here’s what I painted:
-A quick release. I was sitting in the quiet on my porch and I saw the Father hold me while He was crying. He loves me.
Breathe into me.
Breathe your life into me.
Breathe new life into me.
I breathe your breath.
Breathe your new life into me.
I felt as if I was falling and no one was going to catch me. I was listening to worship and the song was talking about the waves. I may have felt as if I was drowning, but God had me. You may not “feel” it, but he’s got you.
I was just listening to music this particular night and needed to release “stuff” so I released it all onto the canvas. It’s therapeutic even if I’m just painting a simple sunset.
I had a rough day and I came home and painted this. I just released everything onto this canvas: frustration, anxiety, worry, performance, …